Bridging the Gap in Your Relationship
Distinctions have the power to build a bridge between you and your partner in order to jumpstart how you process intimacy and warmth. Without distinctions, you base your decisions in one big mix of emotions. For example, when you’re offended with your partner and you’re in pain, you may declare, “I want a divorce!”
Distinguishing love doesn’t mean you have a perfect relationship wherein no one ever gets hurt. Instead, it’s about knowing how to respond to conflicts and to issues. When you’re making finer distinctions, you can come from a place wherein you will pinpoint why you’re feeling hurt and what this hurt has caused to your relationship.
For example, you may be able to distinguish, “I’m hurt because my need for appreciation is not being met.” So, instead of talking about divorce, you talk about how you can resolve this gap. Instead of separating ways, you distinguish love by the desire to address the issues between you and your partner.